4 Tammuz 5983 / 23 June 2023
Day 174
BST: Leviticus 17:1-16, Leviticus 24:1-9, Matthew 9:18-26
DKL: 2 Kings 5, Acts 15:22-35, Psalms 141, Proverbs 17:23
22:29 @813 APA Hotel Shinjuko Tokyo
Dear Yousef,
What a long day it has been, first we checked out early from our Hotel in Sapporo at 6:15AM so we could ride our Bus to the Airport at 6:36am. It was a good thing my sister and I went to the airport a day before so we could know how to go the airport in a most convenient way. We arrived at the airport at around 8AM and we had a little breakfast, and as soon as our plane took off, I closed my eyes crying because even though I am blessed to be traveling with family, I could not help but feel so sad, that I am stuck with this family. It's about time I start my own family and marry you, but I've been stuck with them and I really pray and wish this would be the last trip I have with them because how may more years do we have together??? The LORD is soon returning and I don't think we even have time to raise children because of the urgency and quickness of HIS coming. I closed my eyes praying GOD will soon bring us together, I can't imagine living the same life for the next 5 years. I have been waiting so long for my life to change, I don't want to be in the family business forever! I already asked my Dad to give me time for GOD to bring me to HIS work field, because during our 3 hour exruciating family meeting, it came to a point that my Dad almost kicked me out of the business.... I cannot forget that painful time and I felt so hurt that today all I think about is going to Israel so I can finally meet you. I cannot seem to enjoy the family vacation because I have no concrete plans of going to Israel yet. How I wish I was going there because I was meeting you but you don't even know I am writing letters to you. I am doing this all by faith and these are the hopeless times when my faith fails me because I require a concrete evidence of GOD's promise to come to pass. I am worried not worried about leaving my family, I am worried about leaving Cobe because he might get sick and die without me. I worry for my dogs, not for my parents, and I have to marry you before anyone of them gets sick or else I won't be able to get out of that life. I want to get out because GOD has put a desire in my heart for me to be with you, to make your life my business and all that you care about my business - Psalm 45. I cried to GOD asking HIM to embrace me and to comfort me while HE lets me wait for HIS promise that taking longer than my patience can endure... I cried and cried silently with only the stewardess that could see me.
Then we reached Narita Airport, we had to ride another bus to Shinjuko area for an hour and half. We fell asleep in every ride and then we arrived at our hotel at around 15:00 and decided to eat at a korean place for late lunch but while heading there, I saw a kebab place owned by a Muslim, how I wanted to eat there but I couldn't get myself to separate from my family because this trip was supposed to be a family gathering, so I had to stay with them so that they won't be thinking I am being indifferent, but I am not being indifferent, I am different from them because I didn't enjoy the chosun korean chicken that I ate only a little. I felt sad that I couldn't even eat any place that I liked being in this trip so I just endured the sweet chicken when I wanted to eat middle eastern or Indian. Then David and I went about shopping at Don Quijote, I shopped pasalubong for my workers and few friends. Then I followed David to GU in a Mall. I wanted to look for a crown ring because I lost the golden crown ring GOD gave me in Tagaytay. I Felt so sad that I lost it this afternoon when I stepped out of the plane, I realized something from my hands were missing but it was too late, I can't go back to the plane to search for it anymore. I felt like GOD dethroned me from being queen because maybe HE wasn't pleased with me anymore, so I kept praying that GOD would replace it with another crowned ring in Tokyo and I really looked for one but I had a hard time finding one until I reached the 3rd floor and found a silver crown ring and I bought 2!!! I was so happy that I found 2, it meant double for my trouble. I felt happy that GOD didn't dethrone me but HE wanted to give me 2 for the 1 Iost. If GOD should give us baby twins, I would be more than grateful!!! But I am not even asking to have children because what I need most is you. So today as I write, I am praying that GOD will bring us together soon and that HE will give me a way to go to Israel and stay there longer than a tourist is allowed so that when you go there, we could meet there. When I get back to the Philippines, I am going to apply for ICEJ and I will alppy to as many companies I can find. GOD had already sent me a GO signal, I should not lose time but I should not also speed things up because right now what I need to do is to enjoy and cherish my moments with my family. I am praying for GOD to give me the grace to endure a little more until HE brings us together.
Dear ABBA,
Blesseda re YOU O HOLY ONE of Israel, ADONAI and KING of the Universe! Forgive me O LORD for being a futuristic idealist, that I cannot appreciate the gift of the present day. Forgive me O GOD for my ungratefulness and help me to have the attitude that pleases YOU! Please ABBA bring me to YOUR perfect will, aling my heart, my mind and soul and will to YOUR will for me in each moment for everyday of my life. I pray that YOU work in Mosab's heart and mine in Unity. O LORD, preserve Mosab, reveal to Yousef YOUR will for us O GOD, enable him to ask YOU, to seek YOU and to undrstand the signs of the seasons and what YOU want us to do. I pray that YOU will speak to him as YOU have been speaking to me. Speak to him and prepare him for me. Thank YOU ABBA for this family vacation with my family, for the good health we enjoy and my dogs have because YOU have blessed us. Thank YOU for the time we have and may YOU heal every broken relationship and wound in our hearts. Heal Denesse LORD from all her trauma and brokeness. I pray heal Mom from her oppression and do not allow her to oppress our people anymore. Please Adonai, make everrything right in the business. Please ABBA, take care of me, I don't want to take over the business, I want to live a simple life with Mosab and even though it's not simple that I should be with him because of the dangers of his life, I don't want to be a business woman, but a minister to YOU and a wife to Mosab and mother to our children. That's all I want LORD, I don't want to be a business woman please take me out from this kind of life O GOD because this is not the plan that YOU have for me. So help me ABBA to be all that YOU want me to me, Queen of Ramallah reigning with Yousef when the time comes for YOU to make my Yousef's dreams come true. Please ABBA, make our dreams come true, only YOU can do it GOD, only YOU to whom all things are possible!!!
Ba HaShem YEHOSHUA HaMalkiZedek Amen!