26 Sivan 5983 / 15 June 2023
Day 166
Readings: Leviticus 26:14-46, Hebrews 12:14-29
Dear Yousef,
I have made it a point to do zumba exercise today so that I can prepare my body for the trip we will be having this weekend to Japan. I need to stay alert, sober and active because it irritates my Dad when I am "floating" or being in my own world where I am not connected to them. It usually happens to be when I am in my Watchman Season. Gladly I am already sleeping at night because it "night watching" usually happends in the first quarter of the year and then I go back to being a normal human. But this family of mine cannot give allowance to me being different from them because of their impatience and gracelessness so I have to be "whatever" they expect me to be so that I don't get scolded. But I am looking forward to this trip because I want to enjoy my time with them while I am with them. I have already started applying for Israel and I plan to go this year so I might as well cherish our moments together as family. If we meet when I am there, I am might never return to my homeland.
I want to tell you what happened yesterday after the Bible Study with Pastor Jonah, we went to have dinner and there he confessed that all his dogs have died becasue he listened to his wife to leave the dogs behind instead of bring them wherever they go. They are so broken hearted that I felt so sorry I promised to give them one dog. I also asked my parents to let him and his family have a dog. I am so thankful that Princess is pregnant if this was the reason why GOD had to make her pregnant again so that they can still have a dog even after what has happened, then so be it. But I am praying for her to be healthy and deliver her puppies smoothly like before. Today, I am leaving the office earlier than usual so that I can still do my exercise with Kuya Jun (one who worked for us many years who believes with me that it is GOD's will for me to marry you. I am so grateful for my friends in the workplace, Ma Elsie, Natanel and Kuya Jun (retired Sales Manager) who believes GOD's promise of GOD for me and you and prays with me, supports me to go to Israel so I can finally be with you. Take care and I will write to you later again.
20:00
Now at home, just had dinner, and having green tea. The zumba gave me a boost up and I feel good being able to sweat out the toxins in my body, but I feel that my heart is sort beating really loudly, somewhat abnormal but I ignore it because nothing is ever normal. I was not supposed to eat dinner tonight but I joined my parents because we didn't eat breakfast together since Mom is always late, and I just eat fruits with Dad so I can relieve myself from constipation, other than having coffee. I always think of you, in my everyday activities, while I was doing zumba, I imagined doing this in Israel while you watch me because zumba is not your thing, and then I see you teaching me Yoga and even though I don't like Yoga, I force myself just so I could be with you. Whether we are in Israel or in an island somewhere in the middleeast, I can always do zumba with the video and we can do yoga together. I look forward to being with you but I try to also live in the present because I am naturally future minded and this mentality steals me away from enjoying my now. I am so happy to be having communion with Ma Elsie and then with Natanel in the evening because we get to pray and talk about the LORD. After my communion with Ma Elsie, she shared to me about her peculiar younger sister who is the same age as mine. She had a boyfriend of 3 years but she decided to not marry him but just have a child with him. He insisted to marry her but she wouldn't have it until Ma Elsie told her boyfriend to find someone else to marry because her sister is happy to be single with child! Can you believe this kind of a woman actually exists? I wish I had that mentality because then I won't need anyone. But I am so opposite from that. I desire an intimate relationship with my husband and that our love will bring glory to the KING YESHUA. And I know I can't love just any man, he has to be somebody special, someone who loved my KING too, someone who is living for HIM and someone who is just waiting and praying for the best from GOD. I believe that person is you because I am amazed at how focused you are in the mission GOD gave you, I am amazed at how choosy you are with the woman you would want to love, I am amazed because you waited this long just to find true love, and that's why I am so attracted to you because I am the same too. I am looking for the best, someone I can fall in love with and be completely devoted to and that someone is you. I have not known anyone better than you, and I can't wait to be with you and love for for all the pain and scars in your heart, trauma and all, I love every part of you, your voice, your beauty, so handsome to me. So I am not just going to sit here and wait for you to come to me, I am coming to Israel to bless the Jewish people and meet you there. Please pray that I will be accepted at where I am applying to voluteer, please pray that we will find one another at the right time and place. Please pray for us to be together, in this short time we have now that the end times are running so fast and the return of our KING draweth near, pray for us my beloved my dear.
yours for our lifetime,
Marie Christine