7 Cheshvan 5780
Event: The month of the Unveling
Where do I begin? I'll start from right now, it's 3 in the morning, and I am unusually awake because of what I know now that GOD has kept hidden from me back then.
900 days! 900 days of plowing in a field that's not even going to be yours. Wow! What am I talking about? I will reveal it all here because this is a life testimony that I am willing to be mocked about. Whoever will be reading this, I really don't care what you think of me. I've already been accused "False Prophet" "Crazy Girl" before, for the sake of the truth that I have to share about.
May 10, 2017, GOD revealed to me a man by the name of Natan (for the sake of privacy, as to not threaten the person involved I have to protect his name by using another) as the man of GOD's best choice for me to marry. I believed it completely without a doubt.
February 6, 2018 a Prophet tried to shake or test that revelation while I was in Bacolod and when I was about swayed to believe differently, GOD showed me an open vision of this Natan while I was swimming at the pool. So with this experience, I held on to the vision even more tightly. I've never seen an open vision ever before. It was one of the most remarkable spiritual experiences in my entire life!
August 23, 2018, I dreamt of Natan for the first time and I even commented to myself when I saw him in my dream that he was a short man for a foreigner's standing.
But one Sunday evening Natan got married to a woman. I was devastated, I cried myself to sleep. Not because I love him, no, I don't have any relationship with this man, only the fact that GOD revealed him to me had shred my heart to pieces because:
1- GOD had deceived me again by telling me something that's not going to come true
2- 900 days! Count from May 10, 2017 to October 27, 2019 are a total of 900 days! All those 900 days of praying for him and his family and my prayers never got it's answers and to think I have prayed with fasting during these times, all went down to drain. Yet I still thought, GOD must have a very good reason for all this waiting and praying in vain.
Monday Morning of October 28, Pastora Sarah - one of the Shepherds that has ministered to me had sent me a strong WORD in Genesis 22. I was still confused I didn't know what to think, but I still sang my praises to GOD - You're a good good Father, it's who You are... and I am loved by You, it's who I am... I just needed to remind myself through worship that His character is forever the same, HE is good and faithful no matter what happens to me. But I didn't know what to think, so I was asking my spiritual father Artemio Pacle another word from GOD that I needed to know badly because I wanted to know which way to turn on this faith journey. Pastor Art felt the pressure of asking this word from GOD and finally on Tuesday morning, he delivered GOD's word to me personally and it was from the chapter of 1 Samuel 16. If you have been reading my story chronologically, you will know that these 2 WORDS were the very same WORD GOD gave me when GOD had already wanted me to move forward leaving an unfulfilled promise behind ( Refer to Chapter 3). And Hine! Behold! the same 2 words GOD had used to speak to me this time through His servants and not directly to me because HE knew I would be too confused to even hear from Him. After receiving Genesis 22 and 1 Samuel 16 from faithful pastors of the Lord, I was confident GOD was telling me to move on and so I did. But there are quite some people I needed to do some explaining to because I held them accountable for what GOD has revealed to me. So on
Wednesday, I received a direct WORD from the LORD through the Prophet Jeremiah 20:7
You deceived me, Lord, and I was deceived; you overpowered me and prevailed. I am ridiculed all day long; everyone mocks me.
I also met with my Pastor Prophet Rev. Greatness Tunde for our regular mentoring that day and also asked a Word from GOD. He delivered the WORD in Isaiah 40:1-2
1 “Comfort and keep comforting my people,” says your God. 2 “Tell Yerushalayim to take heart; proclaim to her that she has completed her time of service, that her guilt has been paid off, that she has received at the hand of Adonai double for all her sins.”
GOD had explained to me why HE had to do what He did to me twice, it was because of my sins. Well, I thought okay, fair enough, I had hurt 2 Israeli men when I was in a relationship with them but in the end left them. I understood what it felt like to hope to be with someone forever and be dissppointed because it wasn't going to happen. I deserved whatever GOD would bring to me, except for HIS grace and goodness - that I do not deserve. That day I also told my Dad Dennis this new discovery and events that had happened in my Spiritual life but he was quite calm and understood that GOD's ways are higher than man's ways.
On Thursday morning GOD gave me the opportunity to talk to my Mom about it, I could tell she was as sad as I was, but to me, there was an unexplainable hope that I felt in my heart. Because from my meeting with Rev Greatness I got a revelation from the LORD that I was very near Canaan. In fact, I was already standing there I just didn't know which direction it was, I didn't know yet who this person exactly was. But it's okay, at this point I would rather not know and that he would know first and then tell me. But I knew I was already at the edge of that Promise I just knew it, I felt it.
Friday Morning, we were on our way to Malapascua for the November holiday. On the boat, GOD gives me another word about a man GOD has been leading me to, but has not revealed to me entirely yet:
Matthew 12:18 (NKJV)
18 “Behold! My Servant whom I have chosen,My Beloved in whom My soul is well pleased!I will put My Spirit upon Him,And He will declare justice to the Gentiles."
I took this word literally and started to search with my physical eyes any guy who'd come across me on our vacation in Malapascua. I saw one particular guy who was on his own in a vacation all alone and it fascinated me that a person can be so independent that way that he could just enjoy such vacations without anyone to share it with. I started to visualize his persona being the man GOD was talking about whose soul had pleased the most high GOD. But I couldn't get the picture quite right because he was a caucasian man and I know that I am supposed to be with a middle eastern man - Israeli to be exact. So I rejected this image that didn't quite match up to what I believe GOD wants for me.
On Monday the following week, I could not be still, I had to tell my Pastor Artemio about what had happened and GOD had also led my Pastor to come to my office to talk to me and ask about my family trip. Certainly GOD had always worked with this man of GOD to always guide me when I am feeling unsure about my faith walk. I told him what GOD told me in Matthew 12:18 and to my biggest surprise, Pastor Art became more excited than I was. As we read the rest of the verses of 1 Samuel 16, we came to conclude that GOD was giving me the best of the best - in fact he was better than the best! Therefore he is the bestest! Bestest? there's not even such a word! But the scales of doubt in my eyes began to fade away when he prayed over me to take out the old visions I've held on to for 900 days. As we read the scripture and talked about the new thing that GOD is doing and is trying to show me, I have come to understand fully the depth of this Word in:
Isaiah 43:19 See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.
Now, I have already received this word so long ago, like a year ago perhaps, but I couldn't understand what GOD was saying through this Word until today. Now, everything makes sense. I have never seen my Pastor so excited for me to get married in my whole life.
So today, I am excited and I am even more excited because I've been waking up at 2AM compeled to pray over this man and his family like I always did before. During these wee hours of the dawn, I also was led to write these things down on the book so that I will be able to record everything that has happened and read back on GOD's faithfulness in my life. If ever my husband reads this, He will understand many things and know that he really did hear from GOD. I am praying for him, he needs to have courage to do everything GOD will instruct him to do. He just needs to have faith and boldness because GOD will do great things for him, this person is so special whereby GOD had described him to me as HIS beloved son that pleased the soul of the Almighty! Also, he cannot be late another second because I have been waiting for him my whole life! I have been praying for a husband chosen by GOD since I was 15 years old! It's been 22 years of praying! My GOD! My GOD! Am I going to be like an Abraham whose promise He received after 25 years of waiting? And then with more testings?! O My GOD not anymore! Please! But according to GOD, things will happen according to HIS time, which is - just right on time! Because truthfully, there never was a delay of HIS plans coming to pass in our lives. A delay is an illussion that rightfully means"impatience" in the part of GOD's people. GOD is never late, He makes all things beautiful in His time and His time cannot be delayed, because YESHUA says: "There are unborn children that cannot wait to be born another day".
Psalm 22 CJB
31 (30) A descendant will serve him; the next generation will be told of Adonai. 32 (31) They will come and proclaim his righteousness to a people yet unborn, that he is the one who did it.
